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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    would become a horror story by the end of a marathon stint on Sunday Clippity clop here comes something tip top Things were just getting interesting in the women s 3 000m at the European Championships or in other words all the boring laps had been run and we were getting to the last one when in a weird teleporting moment we were whisked away from Cheboksary to the Maze It s all about the wonder of synchronised swimmers There are times in life when you are genuinely shocked and surprised and here comes some words all in a row that I never thought I would utter I love synchronised swimming Billy on the box Welcome to the velodrome It was shaping up to be a weekend to forget for some of Britain s golden boys from the Olympics but in just one hour and a wee bit all was put right with the world Rangers show plenty of fight but too late for Ibrox men Of course the FA Cup wasn t the only big match last weekend there was one in Scotland too It s a very long way to Wembley The cliché always trotted out for winning league titles is that it s a marathon not a sprint so the FA Cup final should really be no more than a 100 metre dash with a few awkward hurdles to clear on the way to Wembley Not this year Billy Weir on the box Lewis busts in Monte Carlo Things started promisingly in Monaco for the Grand Prix on Sunday and ended with a bang it s just a shame the 90 minutes in between were less than enthralling Associated hype reaches even higher than the Canaries Sky presenter Simon Thomas stood on the Wembley turf as a camera swooped down on him from above to welcome us all to the King Midas Cup Final on Monday afternoon Billy on the box It s our summer of discontent Unseemly squabbling raised voices jostling for position petty name calling and no quarter being asked or given It can mean but one thing the Sunday Game is back He may be retired but champion jockey AP McCoy isn t shy I do many unpleasant things for my devoted reader but even I m beginning to wonder the error of my ways as I sit here in surgery with medical experts frantically trying to bring me round from my self inflicted televisual lobotomy Billy Weir on the box It s V E Day at Badminton trials Sunday is known as a day of rest but not if you re a horse or indeed every equine s favourite presenter Clare Balding more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for the BBC and Tim Peake Billy on the box He may be retired but champion jockey AP McCoy isn t shy Billy on the box A

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=3 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    drawer As I sat in the departure lounge of Faro Airport in Portugal on Sunday morning I was looking forward to coming home and putting my feet up in front of the telly and catching up with a bit of footy Glee for classy Paris St Germain and the old lady sings As I mentioned above the search for live footy has been a fraught affair this week so I was forced to return to Europe to satisfy my needs Hyped up El Clasico turns into a real disappointment You join me in an awkward situation not totally of my own volition as for once I was simply guilty of doing what I was told Six Nations climax just a game of groans for England So have you stopped laughing yet Saturday evening was one of hearty guffaws Sunday full of intermittent snorts by Monday the occasional snigger and on Tuesday a bit of tittering while yesterday it was more satisfied smiles and an inner glow that all was well with the world Formula 1 is back in business and so is Arnold Schwarzenegger When the highlight of a sporting event is an ageing film star in suit and trainers trotting out the same tired catchphrases after two hours of tedium you know that it is going to be a long season Poor show in Cardiff as Ireland flop in Six Nations They came they saw they forgot to conquer and what should have been a big pre St Patrick s Day shindig in Cardiff was more like the Twelfth Day at Joe Biden s house Billy Weir on the box Strange goings on in Nham It wasn t so much Full Metal Jacket as Lovely Silk Jumpers as the Morning Line kicked things off in unusual style for the Cheltenham Festival Billy on the box Roy s not Keane to be on the telly It s not that long ago that Roy Keane told us all that he was a bit fed up with life as a TV pundit because it didn t really challenge him enough Message to ITV please give us a break from the hype And so after all the hype pre bout scuffling unseemly squabbling threats of violence and accusations of gum abuse as expected a fight broke out at the Odyssey on Saturday night Let s play darts and a bit of snooker for a laugh I m never sure about made up sporting competitions even if they are for a good cause which is why Let s Play Darts for Comic Relief and the World Seniors Snooker sat rather uneasily this week Special one Jose Mourinho has a memorable Goals on Sunday Picture the scene in James Beattie s house on Sunday morning You re nervously munching away on your Shreddies excited by the prospect of your imminent appearance on Goals on Sunday delighted that someone still remembers who you are Then the phone rings more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=4 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    week Billy on the box Freddie Flintoff and Kevin Pietersen out on the bash in Oz Meanwhile down in Australia a shortened version of a popular sport is going from strength to strength Hang on Billy on the box We get our Phil as Cup runneth over They always used to say that the race for the league title is a marathon and not a sprint but it seems that the FA Cup Third Round is looking to give it a run for its money Certainty Rory McIlroy left stranded in awkward SPOTY How are your arms and teeth all wailed and gnashed out yet I don t blame you the BBC is a disgrace and should be disbanded immediately I had a foot in both camps as Ulster Rugby travelled to play the Scarlets on Sunday The Welsh are a strange lot and I feel qualified to make such sweeping statements having not been born in the principality but conceived there so I really had a foot in both camps as Ulster travelled to play the Scarlets on Sunday Never mind Foggy in the jungle here s what I missed Picture the scene on Sunday night I ve just made an expedition into the wilds of my kitchen to liberate some Digestives and a lump of cheddar to settle down after the excitement of I m A Celebrity to indulge in a small Bushtucker Trial of my own Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville must be football s oddest couple There are some partnerships that you know are doomed from the start Charles and Di Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt Den and Angie Jordan and anybody and others that defy the odds to survive fish and chips George and Mildred Bert and Ernie and Turner and Hooch And then Premier tennis smash and grab is pure and simple greed There s nothing I like more in my sport than a good old fashioned dollop of greed and hypocrisy Take a bow the International Premier League Tennis Best foot forward for Rocket Ronnie O Sullivan in his desert boots Eurosport rather cheekily has declared war on the BBC with the bold claim that it is now the home of snooker Formula One grand finale deserts us all Exploding and cracking roads in the searing heat of the Middle East as engines roar in the background can mean only one thing there s an exciting end of season nail biter in store for Formula One Billy Weir on the box Something in the air for Robbo in Dublin Picture the scene on Saturday afternoon Gerry Arconada Armstrong is sitting in his string vest in his favourite Spanish tasca enjoying a cerveza when the dulcet tones of Mark Robson filter through from the Aviva Stadium more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for the BBC and Tim Peake Billy on the box He may be retired

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=5 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    on the box JP has no case for the Black Cats defence Match of the Day was a different being altogether on Saturday night as there were strange goings on right from the start Billy On The Box No Chiles play for England As I sit here and reminisce about Sunday evenings my mind fondly rewinds to epic roast dinners a slice of Viennetta and settling down to watch some awful telly We re all flying high in an Epke Zonderland Beth Tweddle is a strange and fascinating being a great British gymnast in her day but the latest in the ever growing line of former sporting heroes who have suddenly become celebrities Billy Weir on the box No easy Ryder at Gleneagles And so after two years of campaigning argument and counter argument families split down the middle and the threat of war the big question was eventually settled in Scotland Billy Weir on the box Croke is it for RTE and Sky It really was a clash to whet the appetite the fancy new upstarts with their highfalutin ways and state of the art systems against the perennial visitors to Croke Park who have been turning up in Dublin since Michael D Higgins was in short trousers Billy Weir on the box United don t want slice of Clattenburg Manchester United are a bit like a Dutch Apple Pie at the moment very pleasing on top full of treats in the middle but the base doesn t stand up to much pressure Billy Weir on the box Vote Yes for more sport First and foremost can I say right up front that I m a big fan of Scotland always have been ever since I had my first battered cheese burger in a chippy in Girvan many moons ago FFA Cup isn t sweet for Tuggeranong I found myself in the unusual position of having Tuesday off so what to do Some household chores a nature ramble a trip to the shops and some essential toe nail maintenance the choices were many Sky strikes rugby gold right away deep down in the Welsh valleys Isn t it amazing the number of sporting events that were seemingly rubbish before Sky got their grubby paws on them Billy on the box Euros are miles better this time I may as well be honest with you straight from the start I m a bit cream crackered so I may not be as pithy you read correctly or full of fun and japes as normal this week Billy Weir on the box Decency out the window By now the yellow ties are back draped over the banisters of homes across the country while frocks of a similar hue have returned into the wardrobes of the assorted Sky lovelies who had been prised into them on Monday afternoon more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=6 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    month of football like no other it is time to have a cursory look back over four weeks of madness mayhem and Martin O Neill from the past four weeks in Brazil ITV boys fawn over Italian stallion Fab It took 60 days of the World Cup before I found myself wholeheartedly agreeing with something Adrian Chiles said It finally happened on Wednesday night Not even Alan Hansen can say a prayer for Brazil Where do you start The most incredible match not just of this World Cup but ever and ITV must have been spitting feathers that it fell into the Farah clad laps of the Beeb World Cup TV View Carlisle has me in a conundrum The countdown to the squeaky bottom section of the World Cup is well and truly upon us so it was natural then that ITV plumped for Clarke Carlisle as co commentator for Argentina s clash with Belgium on Saturday evening Oh Danny boys I love you so There has been wailing and gnashing of teeth by grown men and women for the past two days just because there has been no football on but remember the plus side is that we have had 48 hours without Adrian Chiles Another giant leap for football The Americans may be over sexed over paid and over here or there as the case may be but there s no denying that they left the World Cup with a bang on Tuesday night It s name game in Round of 16 I confess I was a late arrival for the Brazil vs Chile opening game in the Round of 16 on Saturday after my trip to Sainsbury s ran into extra time Diamond duo are on the ball There hasn t been much happening over the past couple of nights so if you will permit me to rewind slightly to earlier in the week where something has been troubling me Robbie has a go at savage You know something major is going down when Gary Lineker comes onto the screen with a serious bake on him and addresses the footballing world Good evening he began ominously the merest hint of a tremor in his dulcet Midlands tones England bow out of the World Cup with a goalless draw against Costa Rica Billy Weir Young ones are a big hit It would be fair to say that there were contrasting fortunes for two pundits from the Emerald Isle as Day Six of the World Cup drew to a boring and tedious close No justice as JP crosses the line this time I have a shameful and sordid secret to share with you I couldn t agree more with Robbie Savage A fab start but the fans get a little shirty And with a few dancing trees raindrops wriggling about on the pitch and JLO trying to escape the clutches of a Pitbull the World Cup was upon us more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=7 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    Oh and a wee bit of cycling too Billy on the box MNF Martin Never Fails They certainly saved the best to last as the final Monday Night Football of the season on Sky Sports was an absolute belter FL72 simply leagues apart You find before you a man sitting on the horns of a dilemma with the troubles of the world resting on his chunky but beautifully formed shoulders Tom Daley s hopes take really big dive on Sky It wasn t a great few days for sporting success by and large Munster lost in the Heineken Cup semi final Derry were stuffed in the National League Final and Mark Allen waved bye bye in the World Snooker Championships Sue Barker knows a thing or Two Irish comedian Dara O Briain once commented that nostalgia is heroin for old people and if that s the case then Sue Barker is Sanatogen for the slightly senile Martin Keown goes in with Two feet It was fitting that on the 50th anniversary weekend on BBC2 the grandson of Match of the Day MOTD2 brought the curtain down on the sporting trip down memory lane It s child s play for antique Aspell s roadshow Clare Balding was on more familiar ground good to soft good in places at Aintree on Saturday afternoon when she popped up in the stables at the start of Channel Four s Grand National coverage Blue Sunday for old order With Sky s recent purchase of a handful of games from the GAA causing the sort of hoohah that would once have accompanied the visit of an Irish President to Windsor it is now time to complete the circle Yikes it s Melanie Sykes presenting the bikes on BT Sport You can only imagine the meetings that were held in the BT Sport office of late when it came to discussing a couple of presenting options that were on the cards hang on I m spotting a theme here Match of the Day given a rebranding You can only imagine the meetings that were held in the Match of the Day office of late when it came to discussing some presenting options that were on the cards And they re off straight into court Rummaging around in my mother s roofspace not so long ago I came across a prized heirloom No not a Ming vase a lost Rembrandt or a Faberge egg but my 1980 Grand Prix wallchart more crash than cash in the attic Batman and Robert the support act to Eagles hit I have a confession to make there are two things that make me leave large steaming mounds more used to being found in a stable behind me roller coasters and horses more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for the BBC and Tim Peake Billy on the box He may be retired but champion jockey

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=8 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    as it does three of my favourite things Michael Caine totty and a bit of football thrown in I ve got that sinking feeling I had just about recovered the doctors assured me I was making good progress and that I was almost back to myself but then it happened a second series of Splash Ulster make the most of mist opportunity There was a certain irony when the nice man on Sky told us to press the red button on Saturday lunchtime to see Ulster take on Treviso in Italy and when we did you couldn t see three feet in front of you Paralympian star Hannah shines at BBC Sports Personality of the Year Well done to paralympian superstar Hannah Cockcroft for being the real winner of the BBC Sports Personality of the Year It s not Real it s just a Sporting fantasy Ah the good old US of A big brash loud and still just not getting football right Keane and Vieira Never mind the Daleks they re all chums now I have it on good authority that I hid behind the settee when the Daleks first appeared on my TV screen but that was nothing compared to when Roy Keane let out a cackle that made by blood curdle on Tuesday night Adrian Chiles goes over the top in search of magic IF the magic of the FA Cup is still very much alive and well according to ITV then why can it not make Adrian Chiles disappear Crafty Cockney Eric Bristow shoots from lip One of the first questions Gabriel Clarke asked in the latest excellent instalment of ITV4 s superb Sports Stories series was what s your biggest strength Hoop springs eternal as BT goes to court Another day and another tick on the wall chart of world domination in BT Sport headquarters with the arrival of basketball in the giant shapes and forms of the NBA The duck the Wade and the wardrobe Just when you thought it was safe to turn on a footy show and not have the likes of Boris Becker pop up in an unusual place never a good thing Virginia Wade takes centre stage on Match of the Day 2 A drop of the Blacks stuff is hard to take Sir Edmund Hillary Dame Kiri Te Kanawa Sir Richard Hadlee Russell Crowe Lord Ernest Rutherford Crowded House your boys took one helluva beating and still won more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for the BBC and Tim Peake Billy on the box He may be retired but champion jockey AP McCoy isn t shy Billy on the box A small Spanish step for Sky another Galaxy for Geoff Shreeves Billy on the box Dour Denver Broncos are sitting on top of the world after Super bowl win Billy on the box Frost nosed celebrities can just go and take

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=9 (2016-02-15)
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  • Sports Columnists - Billy on the Box - BelfastTelegraph.co.uk
    falls in on Bond as man with golden cue rules world I ll have to be quick as at the moment surgeons are on their third jar of Swarfega trying to prise me out of my 1985 Norman Whiteside FA Cup Final jersey To Helen back as Glover is out of depth Questions one Do we still really need A Question of Sport Blake s heaven is simply Super It was fitting that after nine months of worry strain and pushing the Super League Grand Final delivered a bouncing bundle of joy that deserved a small pat on the backside and a hearty well done to all concerned The French give us all a little bit of something that we can all fancy France was rocking on Sunday and I m not just talking about Marseille and PSG coming out to the strains of Van Halen at the Stade Velodrome for Le Classique BT Sport spurred on by title fight There was a strange occurrence at approximately 12 45pm on Saturday lunch time a football match broke out during an horrendously over hyped encounter between two Portuguese men at war A hog roast monster munch and a Burger MY final port of call on the tour to BT Sportland was the Aviva Premiership rugby get together of London rivals Harlequins and Saracens at the aptly named Stoop Balding serves up a big helping of chat with Becker Apart from live footy the enforced repatriation of Clare Balding from the BBC to pastures new was one of the major coups for BT Sport but she has been used sparingly thus far It s time to give local telly fans a sporting chance All roads led south some of them veering off to the west on one of the busiest sporting weekends of the year well certainly for RTE It s simply not cricket as Joe Brolly boxes clever And talking of all things RTE it would be remiss of me not to record the events of the big day at Croke Park where gaelic football took centre stage With cricket boxing and a bit of golf for good measure To be fair Robbie isn t as Pointless as Joe It was a sports special as Pointless Celebrities provided yet another broadcasting vehicle for the once great Joe Calzaghe to prove that he s not very good Legacy leaves us all feeling a little under the weather The phrase Olympic Legacy is one that has been bandied about endlessly long since all the pink hoarding was removed the sand shipped back out of Horse Guard Parade and suspicious steaming mounds shovelled away from Greenwich Park more Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next Most Read Most Shared Most Commented Six Nations a space oddity for the BBC and Tim Peake Billy on the box He may be retired but champion jockey AP McCoy isn t shy Billy on the box Dour Denver Broncos are sitting on top

    Original URL path: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/billy-on-the-box/?page=10 (2016-02-15)
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